Fun stuff

A few light-hearted notes in between the web designer's lamentations...
Same old story in Sussex Gardens...

Search engines
...are a lot of fun. So is peeking through the site logs to find out which
words have been searching for on Google to end up on my site. Apart from the
usual requests for transsexual prostitutes (sure an advertising potential I've
missed), here are some of the more hilarious:
auburn + cropped + hair
If your hairdresser tells about someone coming in with a picture of Jackie and
asking for the same haircut, do let me know.
airline + supervisor + interviews
Not a wise career move, girlie.
restaurant + australian + owned + london + happy + feeling
Can't help there, but Soho Spice is highly recommended.
transsexual + I + quit + smoking
Good for you!
jaye + davidson + where + is + he + now
He's not here, that's for sure!
norman + bradley + leventhorpe
I can vividly imagine the scene before me: "Dear Headmaster Bradley, Found your
address on the net. I went to Leventhorpe in '86. May I have the phone number of
your son, eh, daughter? Yours truly, 'Spotty' P. Hunter"
Buddhist + Bookshop + London + hong + kong
May I humbly suggest using the Yellow Pages?
woman + sex + violin + picture
Whatever your fancy, mate.
hard + woman
"Mistress Jacqueline administers to indifferent piano tuners and inquisitive media moguls.
Call for rates."
pictures + of + christie + Mcauliffe
Yes, Christa McAuliffe
(American teacher killed in Space Shuttle crash) is also a remarkable woman, but
this is not her site.
Vampyros + Lesbos + Soundtrack + On + Vinyl
Nope, but maybe you're interested in the video?
hard + to + be + a + woman
Hard to be a guy at times as well. But I guess not knowing which is the hardest of all.
afraid + of + relationships
Could say the same. Guess I'm a glutton for punishment.
amazon + women + death
They'll probably be the death of me as well... (Did I mention when i was kicked
out of a feminist-dominated amazon mailing list for "heterosexual flirting"?)
lomo + problems
I'll say. Last time the rewind lever fell off and got lost!
big + brother + shower + clips
Sometimes words fail me...
How + to + become + a + prostitute
If there ever was something to learn from this site, this would not be it.
london + windows + wallpaper + paddington
Now I'm being consulted as an interior decorator. You should have seen my flat!
jackie + demon + drawings
Yes, I'm a demon at drawing Jackie! Finally someone who got it right.
big + brother + mpeg + shower
You never give up, do you?

Spam
Actual email from register.com:
From: "register.com"
Subject: register.com - Bridging the Digital Divide
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Wonder how long before they take the point and ask me to register
jackiemcauliffe.ts...